I am so grateful to ALL of my teachers … even the ones I want to punch in the face!
Have you ever known someone who just gets on your very last nerve? Maybe you know a few someones? Maybe you’re related to some of them! Unfortunately, I have found (and this kind of sucks) that sometimes they are simply a mirror showing me something I don’t like about myself (see, told you it sucks!). This concept is summed up perfectly in this line from the movie, Goldmember, “There are two kinds of people I can’t stand, those who are intolerant of other cultures and the Dutch.”
Here’s a little exercise you can do whenever you’re dealing with someone who’s driving you bat shit crazy.
1. Write down all of the annoying shit this person does. What really pisses you off? What do you really hate? Don’t be PC here – write it out in all of its indignant splendor!
2. Now reread it and put “I” in place of the person’s name. Change “John is so over controlling” to “I am so over controlling.” Then ask yourself if it’s true. It won’t always be, but sometimes it will…
So, if right now you just said, “Oh fuck!,” don’t get mad at me! This is a real psychological phenomenon. And don’t be mad at yourself either, it’s pretty common. What’s not that common is someone who is willing to recognize this in themselves. So kudos to you! You have learned something valuable that will help you free yourself from being stuck in this pattern and become a little more tolerant of others’ flaws … and even, perhaps, your own. Which is great, because I simply cannot tolerate people who are intolerant!
Spiral level: Pretty Darn Good, Great!
Use when feeling: people, ugh!, family shit, pissed, lesson